When you really look at humans holistically and our past antecedents coupled with current observations of our fellow species, one does not much have hope for the future
Humans need to look inwards and try to individually clean up themselves instead of pointing fingers at others. If each human cleans up his/her act indiv…
When you really look at humans holistically and our past antecedents coupled with current observations of our fellow species, one does not much have hope for the future
Humans need to look inwards and try to individually clean up themselves instead of pointing fingers at others. If each human cleans up his/her act individually, doesn't that mean we have cleaned up humanity collectively?
Agree with your comment to a point. My question is, who gets to define what 'cleans up his/her act' looks like in practice? For good or ill at various points and places in history groups of people have had a shared vision of what that meant. Today the highest form of good is professed to be that everyone gets to live their own reality (whatever that means). That every human is different means, in this framing, that every reality is different with all the flaws humans bring to the table. Perhaps we all need to compromise our reality a bit so we can create a generally accepted reality that is a guideline to use when we 'clean up our act'.
While I doubt anyone could come up with a step by step plan on what you need to do, there have been various people over the years who thought about this. And I think there's a direction where they have been pointing to.
I think it points to mindfulness and compassion. Lot of people go wrong because they get swayed by their "negative" emotion without being aware of the causes their actions will have. From my own experience I think one of the most destructive thing that can happen to people is not accepting a loss of something. To give an example I have a friend who wrote to me that she's not feeling great about her relationship, and after a bit of talking I got what her issue was. She wanted a soulmate, and she had an idea of what kind of person that would be and what he would do, but her boyfriend didn't fit that. While resenting that, she also really believed he is her soulmate and someone she has to stay with. A loss of him would be traumatic, but so is the loss of her fantasy.
The thing is that her boyfriend is not a fantasy character but a real person. And you won't ever find your fantasy person because they only exist in your head. I've explained to her that she has found a person with his own wishes and plans in life, and if they both want to build something great together they can, but you can't just transform your rigid fantasies onto reality because that denies things their own nature. By doing that she was creating friction as her boyfriend couldn't possibly have known what she wanted.
Now this story has a happy ending, last I heard of them they were still together and doing good, but it just shows how an her aversion to loss and fixation on fantasy caused cracks in the relationship.
Now, don't take me wrong, I'm not saying you should bend yourself for others and sacrifice your own needs. That causes it's own misery and you need to have backbone in life. But be aware of what actions your thoughts are causing. And realize the world doesn't revolve around you and find ways of "negotiating" with others.
Lot of suffering comes from the denial of others. Like the thought parents might have that they own their children, or partners who believe they own the other one in a relationship, or the view of nature as livestock. Once you see things as yours to control and own you stop caring about needs of others. Which might feel good if you are the one doing it, but sooner or later you are going to be on the receiving end of this if we won't stop playing these games.
Your last paragraph and last line really drives the point home. Humans have to stop playing these very harmful games and face reality for ultimately we are just furthering the collective punishment of our species and the time for healing has long been upon us but we have refused to heal and just keep on hurting one another
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When you really look at humans holistically and our past antecedents coupled with current observations of our fellow species, one does not much have hope for the future
Humans need to look inwards and try to individually clean up themselves instead of pointing fingers at others. If each human cleans up his/her act individually, doesn't that mean we have cleaned up humanity collectively?
Simplistic I know, but you get my point
Agree with your comment to a point. My question is, who gets to define what 'cleans up his/her act' looks like in practice? For good or ill at various points and places in history groups of people have had a shared vision of what that meant. Today the highest form of good is professed to be that everyone gets to live their own reality (whatever that means). That every human is different means, in this framing, that every reality is different with all the flaws humans bring to the table. Perhaps we all need to compromise our reality a bit so we can create a generally accepted reality that is a guideline to use when we 'clean up our act'.
While I doubt anyone could come up with a step by step plan on what you need to do, there have been various people over the years who thought about this. And I think there's a direction where they have been pointing to.
I think it points to mindfulness and compassion. Lot of people go wrong because they get swayed by their "negative" emotion without being aware of the causes their actions will have. From my own experience I think one of the most destructive thing that can happen to people is not accepting a loss of something. To give an example I have a friend who wrote to me that she's not feeling great about her relationship, and after a bit of talking I got what her issue was. She wanted a soulmate, and she had an idea of what kind of person that would be and what he would do, but her boyfriend didn't fit that. While resenting that, she also really believed he is her soulmate and someone she has to stay with. A loss of him would be traumatic, but so is the loss of her fantasy.
The thing is that her boyfriend is not a fantasy character but a real person. And you won't ever find your fantasy person because they only exist in your head. I've explained to her that she has found a person with his own wishes and plans in life, and if they both want to build something great together they can, but you can't just transform your rigid fantasies onto reality because that denies things their own nature. By doing that she was creating friction as her boyfriend couldn't possibly have known what she wanted.
Now this story has a happy ending, last I heard of them they were still together and doing good, but it just shows how an her aversion to loss and fixation on fantasy caused cracks in the relationship.
Now, don't take me wrong, I'm not saying you should bend yourself for others and sacrifice your own needs. That causes it's own misery and you need to have backbone in life. But be aware of what actions your thoughts are causing. And realize the world doesn't revolve around you and find ways of "negotiating" with others.
Lot of suffering comes from the denial of others. Like the thought parents might have that they own their children, or partners who believe they own the other one in a relationship, or the view of nature as livestock. Once you see things as yours to control and own you stop caring about needs of others. Which might feel good if you are the one doing it, but sooner or later you are going to be on the receiving end of this if we won't stop playing these games.
Your last paragraph and last line really drives the point home. Humans have to stop playing these very harmful games and face reality for ultimately we are just furthering the collective punishment of our species and the time for healing has long been upon us but we have refused to heal and just keep on hurting one another
No wonder the world is in shambles right now